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The 4 Mindsets I Had To Develop To Navigate My Inner Struggles As A New Coach

  • sent by Siddharth Anantharam
  • September 21, 2023
The 4 Mindsets I Had To Develop To Navigate My Inner Struggles As A New Coach

This one’s for all the new coaches out there who are transitioning into coaching.

“I feel like I am standing on the edge of a cliff, peering out at the open skies—limitless, exhilarating, and yet… very very intimidating!”

I was mentoring a new coach recently and this is how she described her transition.

Did it hit home? It definitely did for me.

Because when I first started coaching, I felt something similar – like a juggler at a circus, spinning multiple plates at once, yet fearing they’ll all crash down at any moment?!

If you feel this too, I want you to know that you are not alone.

Almost 8 years ago, when I first started as a coach, I thought that having a strong skill set was all I needed!

But I was wrong.

I ended up overwhelmed, undercharging for my services, and hopping from one program to another. The first year especially was a crazy period because I was constantly doubting myself and wondering if this would ever be something that can sustain me financially.

Which is why, If I could turn back time here’s one thing I would do differently:

I would tackle my INNER GAME first!

I would double up in understanding my fears, aligning my mindsets, and setting my internal compass straight before diving deep into building my coaching practice.

Ignoring the inner game is like setting sail on a rickety boat; you’re bound to face storms that could easily sink you. If you neglect to address these foundational mindsets, your potential for impact, financial freedom, and emotional well-being could all be severely hampered.

Here’s what ELSE might happen:

  • Your relationships suffer because you’re constantly stressed or distracted.
  • Your self-esteem takes a nosedive as you feel like a fraud or failure.
  • You find yourself perpetually chasing the next “big thing,” never really committing to any path.
  • You start to resent your coaching practice, which was once your dream.
 

Which is why I want to share today’s newsletter with you.

I want you to taste the freedom, alignment, and boundless possibilities that come from sorting out your inner game first!

Because when you do this:

  • You will approach every client conversation with genuine confidence.
  • Your sense of purpose and alignment will energize you, even when you face challenges.
  • Financial flow becomes a rewarding exchange of value, not a stressor.
  • You become an anchor for others because you are anchored within yourself.

When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.

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"I Never Have Enough Time": The Battle Against Procrastination and Overwhelm

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When you say, “I never have enough time,” what you’re often really saying is, “I’m afraid of committing fully because what if I fail?”

I’ve been in this exact spot, staring at my jam-packed calendar, filling it intentionally with less critical things so that I could have a ‘valid’ reason for not stepping fully into my coaching role.

It’s a safety mechanism, isn’t it? Overwhelm serves as a shield, protecting us from facing potential failure—or success.

The notion of “enough time”  is quite elusive.

The clock seems to mock you, ticking faster as your to-do list grows longer.

This is what the ancient Greeks called “Chronos” time—quantifiable, linear, always in a rush.

Trust me, I’ve been there. Days when each tick of the clock was a reminder that I was falling further behind on my ambitions and responsibilities.

The Mindset Shift

It’s not about adding more hours to the day; it’s about changing your relationship with time itself.

It’s not about managing your time, it’s really about managing your energy.

Have you heard of “Kairos” time? This is the qualitative aspect of time, moments that are indeterminate and rich with experience and meaning. This is where your energy is at it’s peak.

Shifting your perspective from a Chronos-focused view to a Kairos-oriented outlook can be liberating. It’s like trading in a leaky rowboat for a sturdy sailboat—you can’t control the wind, but you can absolutely adjust your sails.

Your Tiny First Step:

Instead of diving into the chaos of tomorrow’s obligations, carve out a pocket of serenity for yourself in the morning.

In that oasis of quiet, take five minutes to breathe in deeply, anchoring yourself in the present and ask:

What are the three most pivotal actions that will create meaningful progress in my coaching journey today?

Think not just of tasks, but of impactful actions that resonate with your inner core.

By embracing both Chronos and Kairos, you align your actions not just with the demands of the clock but with the deeper calling of meaningful work and life. You turn from being a victim of time to its master. 🌟

"I Feel Guilty Charging People": Money as a Measure of Worth

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If you’ve ever choked up when discussing your coaching fees, trust me, you’re not alone. I’ve been there, staring into a client’s expectant eyes, feeling like a fraud. Why?

Because deep down, I was grappling with my own sense of self-worth. This isn’t just about dollars and cents; this is about value—your value.

My palms were sweaty, my heart raced—I was terrified. Not of their reaction, but of confronting my own sense of worth. Was this all I was really worth?

Each time you hesitate to state your fee, you’re essentially questioning your own worthiness.

For me, it felt like standing on the edge of a cliff, afraid to take the leap for fear of how far I’d fall.

The Mindset Shift:

When you step into the coaching arena, realize you’re not just offering a few conversations.

You’re offering transformation. Change. A paradigm shift.

Understand that when people invest in you, they’re not buying time; they’re investing in a better version of themselves or their business. This isn’t a transaction; it’s a transformation.

When I finally understood this, I saw that my fees were not just numbers but a reflection of the deep, transformative changes I was facilitating in people’s lives.

Your pricing is a mirror reflecting the tremendous value you bring to the table.

Your Tiny First Step:

Tonight, find a moment of solitude and deep listening.

Light a candle if you must or find that space where you’re most honest with yourself.

Journal your response to this question:

What is the real transformation and value I bring to my clients?

If you like more structure ask yourself:

  1. What dream outcomes do I help my clients achieve?
  2. How do I increase their likelihood of success?
  3. How do I reduce their time and effort?
 

Don’t rush for an answer; allow it to resonate within you, like a ripple expanding across the water.

Once you grasp the value you bring to the table, you’ll find not just the confidence to charge appropriately but the deep satisfaction of knowing that your work is a gamechanger in the truest sense.

By aligning what you charge with the transformation you deliver, you affirm your worth, creating an energetic exchange that benefits both you and your client. You shift from being apprehensive about money to being confident about the value you deliver. 💫

"I Can't Stick to One Thing": Distraction as a Fear of Commitment

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You’ve likely heard that the grass is always greener on the other side. The promise of the ‘next big thing,’ is a perfect escape from the responsibility of the present moment, isn’t it?

Well, what if that restless searching for the ‘next big thing’ is just a smoke screen?

I was the master of the shiny object syndrome, hopping from one venture to another like a rabbit in a field of endless possibilities.

I told myself, “I’m not scattered; I’m versatile!” The reality? I was afraid—afraid of what dedicating myself to a single endeavor would mean. Afraid that if I went all in and failed, there would be nowhere else to turn. This restlessness wasn’t versatility; it was a hidden fear of commitment.

The Mindset Shift:

Here’s the hard truth that we often ignore: True mastery—real, deep, impactful work—comes from diving deep, not skimming the surface. Every detour we take is time away from achieving greatness in our chosen path.

We often think that by doing more, by being more versatile, we’re enhancing our value.

But what if the real value lies in becoming irreplaceable in one single area? By committing to one path, you’re not limiting yourself; you’re freeing your energy to achieve true mastery.

Your Tiny First Step:

Journal your response to this critical question:

What is the one endeavor that, if I gave it my all, could be a game-changer in my life?

Reflect on this. Let the question sink in, and pay attention to what bubbles up. Your intuition knows where your treasure lies; you just have to be willing to dig deep to uncover it.

For me, I realized that coaching was something I enjoyed SO much that I could do it without doubt for the rest of my life. No questions asked.

"Who Am I to Coach Anyone?": The Inner Critic’s Chokehold

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Ah, the haunting voice of self-doubt. I remember it well. It used to trail me like a shadow, throwing a veil over every ambitious plan I had. It whispered, “Are you good enough for this?” every time I took a new step. It’s humbling but also paralyzing.

The Mindset Shift:

Here’s the breakthrough: Confidence doesn’t mean you have all the answers; it means you’re open to making a big enough COMMITMENT to find them.

This is what I like to call “confident humility.”

You acknowledge that you don’t have all the tools YET! But you still believe in your own COURAGE and CAPABILITY to figure it out.

You realize you can be a rookie and a veteran in different areas of the same life.

The magic lies in blending confidence with humility so you can learn and grow.

Your Tiny First Step:

Pose this question to yourself:

What is one lesson I’ve learned in my life that no one else can coach through quite like me?

Focus on that. It’s your unique starting point. Your first Commitment.

You don’t need to be fully confident to start; you just need to be courageously committed.

And remember, confidence is the reward for those who journey through commitment, courage, and capability. Are you ready to take that first step?

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